Overwhelmed? How to know and what to do about it…
An impressive capture of CW founder Blake Cason… from a moment of overwhelm in the Argentine alpine.
“It’s hard to read the label when you’re stuck inside the jar.”
There you are, body shaking, a mosh-pit of thoughts beating around the inside of your head, focused on all that is wrong, dangerous, or unplanned in the world around you. Those thoughts are so strong, in fact, that you have totally lost touch with your body besides its overwhelming sensations of tension, pain, or terror. Your eyes are moving quickly, your breath is shallow from your chest, and your mind’s-eye is playing all the potential, emanate destruction.
You are in “overwhelm.”
Once, while navigating my own overwhelmed state, someone near me offered, “Blake, you’re thinking fast.” In that moment, I was stunned. How could they know my mind was racing a million miles an hour, totally indiscernible? It was very, very obvious, that’s how. In fact, this is only one version of overwhelm, others can look like quite the opposite, strangely enough. Overwhelm can look like avoidance, stunned silence, or even people-pleasing.
No matter how overwhelm looks on you, it is the breach of mental, emotional, and/or physical limit capacity. It is when our resources are so taxed that they begin to malfunction, in a way. We have exited what psychology calls our Window of Tolerance and, effectively, all bets are off. Indeed, all best intentions, conscious actions, or flexibility are replaced with the desperate need to fight, flight, freeze, or appease.
You are in your Red Zone, stuck inside the “jar” of automatic, primordial reactions. It’s really hard to see out of those things. And, fortunately, still very possible with some healthy habits.
The Green, Yellow, Red Zone image is really helpful on this topic. It illustrates how our experiences can come across to us as Go, Slow, or Stop like a traffic light; in other words, easy, challenging, or overwhelming. For example, Janet is in her Green/Go Zone of ease when they are mowing the lawn on a sunny Saturday. She is in her Slow/Yellow Zone of challenge when has to drive in an active snow storm. On the other hand, Janet often finds herself in her Stop/Red Zone of overwhelm when she has to babysit 3 toddlers at the same time… I feel you, Janet.
These three examples would land differently on someone else’s spectrum of tolerance or challenge. For me, for example, having never operated a lawn mower, doing so would land me squarely in my Yellow Zone of challenge, on an average day. If, however, I was depleted mentally, emotionally, or physically and fell into reactivity, I would certainly get overwhelmed and have to stop pushing myself to learn something new and intimidating.
To continue this above example, if I were beginning to react to the challenges of learning to mow a lawn with anger, avoidance, or helplessness, I would be outside of my window of tolerance, in overwhelm, and in need of a change in trajectory. A U-turn, if you will.
Allow me to explain and offer some examples from athletes:
Step 1 of making a U-turn: Notice the physical, mental and emotional sensations. These are powerful cues about what state our brain/body are in. I could notice that my thoughts are fast and negative, I’m not feeling my body very much, and those around me seem like obstacles to easing the tension of the moment.
Gnarly athlete Jared Godfrey, rock climber, experienced three-quarters of the way up a very tall “highball” boulder. He suddenly realized he was overwhelmed in going for a committing move, that once he did, he would have to keep ascending to the top to stay safe.
Step 2: Pause. After I notice what is going on inside my body and mind, I try to let that awareness settle for a moment. It is very real, and maybe not true that everything is as bad as it feels in that moment. Ask yourself, “Can I be with this?” You may need a break, a release from the stressful input, or just a breather to reorient yourself.
Gnarly athlete Kelly Halpin, mountain runner, grappled with this out solo in Greenland. Well up a mountain, she felt the moss and rocks beneath her start to fail under her weight. She recounts: “I froze. After what felt like an eternity, but in reality was probably no more than a few seconds, I knew I had to move to get myself out of the situation. I took a few deep breaths to keep myself from panicking then spread my weight out as much as could on different points of contact. I managed to pull myself onto a solid ledge just as the rocks under me fell away.”
Step 3: Resource. If you need to dial it back or step away, try naming the experience in your mind or to a safe-someone near you. Take a break by doing something that you enjoy and can control for a moment, like move your body, play with the dog, talk to a loved one, drink a cup of tea… Your pool of internal resources has a big hole in it, let’s plug it and begin to add back into the reserves. It may take lots of time and resourcing to get clear, stable, and strong again. That’s okay. Over time, we learn what it feels like when we have only caught our breaths versus when we have fully rested and are ready for anything.
Gnarly athlete Dru Mack, rock climber, offers his lessons on resource from potential “jitters” and overwhelm with performance: “I think I'm learning to stay a bit more present in the moment, using mantras like ‘I'm here to try’ removes the pressures of sending or falling. I also use things like music, or goofing with my friends to take some of the edge off. Try hard and have fun, those are the only true things you can have control over!”
Going through these steps will begin slowing the “roll” into total meltdown. For me, that “roll” can sometimes feel like it's greased, like I have no choice. No matter, I remind myself, anytime is a good time to notice you are in overwhelm – whether before it starts, or well into its impact. Practicing these steps help bring us back into our challenge zone, where we can learn and grow, or our rest zone, where we can really resource and prepare for another lesson in Life School. This is the crucial work of strengthening the skills of preventing and managing overwhelm – it will happen, and having experience with recognizing and shifting our state is what makes all the difference.
Originally written by Blake Cason for Gnarly Nutrition’s blog